Today starts my 3rd week of crossfit. I somehow survived the first 2 weeks. I still think those people are crazy šŸ˜‚

I’ve been interested in crossfit for a very long time. Back in the early 00s I studied and began gravitating toward ‘paleo’ nutrition and all those people loved to talk about crossfit.

I always thought, I’ll lose some of this weight and then I’m gonna start doing that! I would lose some and gain some, and lose some again and gain some more. And it never happened.

Then, several years ago, my best friend started crossfit. I was so proud of her for getting out there, and I loved watching her transformation – not so much physically, but the transformation of how she saw herself. The first time I ever met her she mentioned adamantly the whole ‘healthy eating and exercise’ thing was not for her. And then she was out there throwing these weights around, doing handstands, and whatever other wild things she did.

As a bystander it was a pretty awesome thing to witness. She was trying to do crazy things she’d never tried before. She was getting cut! Buff! Biceps, shoulders, quads! She was incredible. (She might rather I stop talking about it! Haha)

I felt so proud of her and impressed by all she was doing. And, of course, it revived my interest in crossfit.

But I still didn’t feel like I was in a good place to make the workouts part of my own life. I was, by now, heavier than I had ever been. And I know I mention this in all my ‘why I was scared to try‘ posts… But arthritis. The period of my life when I couldn’t grasp my toothbrush was still very fresh and vivid…. And I’m looking at crossfit?! Not for me. Not at all. I needed to be looking to activities meant for grandmas!

I didn’t feel ready yet.

But, finally I’ve decided I’m tired of my own bullshit. I’m tired of my self limiting ideas. I’m tired of being bullied and controlled by my fears and things I’m intimidated by. I’m tired of all of it! It’s not good enough for me anymore! It doesn’t fit my life or my goals anymore!

I’ve purposed from the beginning of 2018 to stop avoiding things that scare me.

CrossFit is one of those things.

I’m still not ready. I was scared to death the first day I walked in. I wanted to turn and leave so bad.

I had to keep reminding myself ‘stop avoiding things that scare you, stop avoiding things that scare you.’

Speaking of scaring me, I walked into my third workout and these ludicrous people are talking about box jumps. I was thinking there’s no way.

My coach stacked up some 45lb plates – 4 of them – and said you’re jumping on that. And, after some deliberation and courage mustering, I did it.

I was pretty shocked. I mean, that stack of weights is almost as tall as the stupid box!

I made it my bitch! šŸ˜‚

I think that was a really big turning point for me. If I can jump on that stack of weights, even though certain I can’t…..what else can I do?

I anticipate finding out.

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