I’ve just read yet another article discussing the dangerous messages being sent to our children through toys and clothes that indicate boys are valued for their strength and abilities whereas girls are valued for caretaking and appearance.
And I agree. It’s a dangerous and limiting message.
But I can’t figure out why we’re so worried about toys and clothes while we are ripping our children in half at the emotional experience.
Maybe if our boys were allowed to be sad and tender, if they were allowed to be soft and vulnerable, if they were allowed to feel all of their emotions, if they aren’t shamed for emotions that fall outside of happy or angry….
Maybe if our girls were allowed to be angry, and smart, and tenacious, and harsh…. If they were allowed to be things other than submissive and sweet…
Maybe if our children are allowed their full emotional experience, rather than only being allowed those deemed appropriate for their sex….. Maybe of we stop robbing our children of so much of who they inherently are…..
Maybe then we won’t have to worry so much that the doctor roles go to boys while the nurse roles go to girls in school plays. Or that boys get pizza motifs on their clothing, while girls get donuts or cookies on theirs. Then we won’t have to worry that these messages will carry so much weight, and be so damaging to our children.
Maybe if our children are allowed to be whole we will know they are ready for a hard and imperfect world, rather than feebly attempting to control every aspect of the world they live in.